Ok, we’ve seen Avengers: Infinity War (2018). You can tell us spoilers. Actually, there wasn’t anything to spoil in this one, since everyone heard about the Snap - “Mr. Stark, I don’t feel too good”.
It starts in space, with Thanos attacking the Asgardian’s space ark to steal the Tesseract Power Stone. He kills Loki and pretty much everyone else, but sends Hulk to Earth. There, he tells Dr. Strange about the situation, and they get Tony Stark in on the project, who brings along Peter Parker. When Thanos’ goons attack, Dr. Strange and Spider-man wind up on their spaceship.
Meanwhile, the Gaurdians of the Galaxy rescue Thor, who takes them all to a Troll planet so that a giant Peter Dinklage can forge him a battle axe. Also, Vision and the Red Witch go to Wakanda to preserve Vizh’s Soul Gem.
And ... I am relying heavily on the Wikipedia plot summary to get this far. A lot of Marvel movies are overstuffed with character and plot, and this one tops them all. At least I was awake for the whole thing. Ms. Spenser conked out about 10 minutes in.
In the end, what with all the hurly-burly and goings-on, I remember almost nothing about this 2-1/2 hour movie. I enjoyed it, loved watching it, but took almost nothing away. Of course, since I expect most of the movie’s consequences to be reversed in the next one, maybe that’s OK. But I suspect this odd amnesia will only make it more fun to re-watch.
Monday, October 15, 2018
Sunday, October 14, 2018
Slash Fic
The Final Girls (2015) is one of those self-aware slasher movie spoofs. One with a heart.
Taissa Farmiga is a young girl whose mother is an aspiring actress, who’s big role was as a scream queen in cult slasher movie Camp Blood Bath. But her mother Malin Akerman is killed in a car crash. Cut to 3 years later. Obnoxious friend Thomas Middleditch convinces her to go to a midnight screening of Camp Blood Bath as a special guest. She reluctantly goes, along with Middleditch’s (half-)sister, Alia Shawcat, and Farmiga’s maybe-boyfriend, Alexander Ludwig. To her dismay, Ludwig’s ex-girlfriend, Nina Dobrev is also along.
At the theater, some rowdy fans cause a fire, and Farmiga leads her friends through the screen to escape. But through the screen turns out to be into the movie.
They find themselves beside a road, when a van full of camp counselors drives by - the opening scene of the movie. After 92 minutes, the length of the movie, it drives by again. Finally, they pretend to be counselors too and jump on board.
Middleditch, a confirmed horror hound, is very psyched to be in the movie. When Farmiga realizes that her dead mother is now the bubbly, scantily clad girl asleep in the back, she is terrified but filled with a great longing to be with her again.
Soon, the slasher shows up. Middleditch isn’t worried, because he doesn’t get killed in the movie (he isn’t even in it). But it turns out that the rules don’t work that way, and he is bloodily slaughtered. SPOILER- he comes back to life, and is immediately hit by a car.
So we get the usual “What to do if you find yourself in a slasher movie” stuff - mostly they try to keep the teens from having sex. They find themselves in a flashback, which is fun and even comes back as a plot device. Mixed in with this is Farmiga’s chance to get to know her mother as a young woman, as a peer and friend. Also, trying to keep her alive.
This may not be the greatest example of this genre, but it is pretty funny. It’s also pretty generous and has a good ending - SPOILER - it was all a dream, no it wasn’t, but everyone (who wasn’t from movie world) is still alive. And there’s a hook for a sequel.
Taissa Farmiga is a young girl whose mother is an aspiring actress, who’s big role was as a scream queen in cult slasher movie Camp Blood Bath. But her mother Malin Akerman is killed in a car crash. Cut to 3 years later. Obnoxious friend Thomas Middleditch convinces her to go to a midnight screening of Camp Blood Bath as a special guest. She reluctantly goes, along with Middleditch’s (half-)sister, Alia Shawcat, and Farmiga’s maybe-boyfriend, Alexander Ludwig. To her dismay, Ludwig’s ex-girlfriend, Nina Dobrev is also along.
At the theater, some rowdy fans cause a fire, and Farmiga leads her friends through the screen to escape. But through the screen turns out to be into the movie.
They find themselves beside a road, when a van full of camp counselors drives by - the opening scene of the movie. After 92 minutes, the length of the movie, it drives by again. Finally, they pretend to be counselors too and jump on board.
Middleditch, a confirmed horror hound, is very psyched to be in the movie. When Farmiga realizes that her dead mother is now the bubbly, scantily clad girl asleep in the back, she is terrified but filled with a great longing to be with her again.
Soon, the slasher shows up. Middleditch isn’t worried, because he doesn’t get killed in the movie (he isn’t even in it). But it turns out that the rules don’t work that way, and he is bloodily slaughtered. SPOILER- he comes back to life, and is immediately hit by a car.
So we get the usual “What to do if you find yourself in a slasher movie” stuff - mostly they try to keep the teens from having sex. They find themselves in a flashback, which is fun and even comes back as a plot device. Mixed in with this is Farmiga’s chance to get to know her mother as a young woman, as a peer and friend. Also, trying to keep her alive.
This may not be the greatest example of this genre, but it is pretty funny. It’s also pretty generous and has a good ending - SPOILER - it was all a dream, no it wasn’t, but everyone (who wasn’t from movie world) is still alive. And there’s a hook for a sequel.
Monday, October 8, 2018
Two Girls
Night Editor/One Girl's Confession (1946) is another one of those nifty B-movie double features. The theme is "Bad Girls"
Night Editor starts with a framing story. A guy stumbles into a newspaper office after midnight, and sits down with his head in his hands. The night editor and other boys playing cards start telling a story about another guy they knew with problems. It was William Gargen, a policeman with a sweet wife (Jeff Donnell) and son, and a socialite girlfriend (Janis Carter). While making out with the girlfriend in lover's lane, they see a guy in another car bludgeon his girl to death with a tire iron and run off. Since he's in a compromised position, he doesn't try to catch the guy. Carter, meanwhile, is kind of excited by the violence - she wants to see the body. She is a real psycho.
The upshot is that Gargen has to investigate the murder, while hiding the fact that he was a witness - and if they scope his tire tracks, he'll be a suspect. He quickly finds that the victim ran in the same circles as his psycho girlfriend, Carter. One of her men friends looks a lot like the guy they spotted running. But when he calls him in for a statement, his alibi is Carter.
It ends with a moral and the reporter with the problems heads home to his wife and kids with a bounce in his step. But at least we got some really depraved sex and violence in the upper classes on the way.
One Girl's Confession is a different type of story. It stars platinum blonde Cleo Moore, a B-movie Marilyn Monroe. She is waitressing in a low dive run by the man who cheated her father, and who raised her. One night, she steals the money he makes on shady drug deals. When the police come, she confesses freely, but won't let anyone know where the money is.
She does her prison time well, making friends, keeping her nose clean and working the prison garden. As a result, she gets let out after serving only a year. But she's convinced they are still keeping an eye on her so she can't get the money. She gets a waitress job at director Hugo Haas' joint. Haas plays a Balkan wiseguy, who cares more about some complicated Balkan card game than running the restaurant - and maybe his girlfriend Smooch, Helene Stanton.
Things are looking up for Moore. She meets a nice sailor, Glenn Langan (AKA Glen Manning, The Amazing Colossal Man). She even considers giving Langan her money. Then Haas has a bad run of cards and loses everything, including the bar. So she offers the money to him, telling him where to dig it up - she thinks she is still being watched.
But he comes back empty handed, thinking she's playing tricks, and throws her out. She is so distraught at losing the money and her job that she gets holes up in bed for three days. When she comes back, the restaurant has a new owner, but only because Haas has sold it. He is now living in a penthouse and having a big party. Moore goes to confront him, assuming he stole the money and hid it from her. When he drunkenly mashes on her, she hits him with a bottle - and Smooch tells her he is dead. And he got the money from a card game the morning after he lost the bar.
She runs to the hiding place and finds the money under a tree's roots. She is so upset that she gives the money to an orphanage and goes to the police. But when she confesses, they call Haas and he answers the phone - he had just been knocked out - I'm not sure if Smooch was kidding or mistaken, but the police turn her away, and after she kind of tries to get the money back, she winds up with her sailor.
This is a fun movie with a lot of suspense and twists, and a slightly mystifying happy ending. But Cleo Moore is the best part - a down-to-earth beauty, honest to a fault, and open to love. I'd love to see more of her, but there doesn't seem to be any on Netflix.
Night Editor starts with a framing story. A guy stumbles into a newspaper office after midnight, and sits down with his head in his hands. The night editor and other boys playing cards start telling a story about another guy they knew with problems. It was William Gargen, a policeman with a sweet wife (Jeff Donnell) and son, and a socialite girlfriend (Janis Carter). While making out with the girlfriend in lover's lane, they see a guy in another car bludgeon his girl to death with a tire iron and run off. Since he's in a compromised position, he doesn't try to catch the guy. Carter, meanwhile, is kind of excited by the violence - she wants to see the body. She is a real psycho.
The upshot is that Gargen has to investigate the murder, while hiding the fact that he was a witness - and if they scope his tire tracks, he'll be a suspect. He quickly finds that the victim ran in the same circles as his psycho girlfriend, Carter. One of her men friends looks a lot like the guy they spotted running. But when he calls him in for a statement, his alibi is Carter.
It ends with a moral and the reporter with the problems heads home to his wife and kids with a bounce in his step. But at least we got some really depraved sex and violence in the upper classes on the way.
One Girl's Confession is a different type of story. It stars platinum blonde Cleo Moore, a B-movie Marilyn Monroe. She is waitressing in a low dive run by the man who cheated her father, and who raised her. One night, she steals the money he makes on shady drug deals. When the police come, she confesses freely, but won't let anyone know where the money is.
She does her prison time well, making friends, keeping her nose clean and working the prison garden. As a result, she gets let out after serving only a year. But she's convinced they are still keeping an eye on her so she can't get the money. She gets a waitress job at director Hugo Haas' joint. Haas plays a Balkan wiseguy, who cares more about some complicated Balkan card game than running the restaurant - and maybe his girlfriend Smooch, Helene Stanton.
Things are looking up for Moore. She meets a nice sailor, Glenn Langan (AKA Glen Manning, The Amazing Colossal Man). She even considers giving Langan her money. Then Haas has a bad run of cards and loses everything, including the bar. So she offers the money to him, telling him where to dig it up - she thinks she is still being watched.
But he comes back empty handed, thinking she's playing tricks, and throws her out. She is so distraught at losing the money and her job that she gets holes up in bed for three days. When she comes back, the restaurant has a new owner, but only because Haas has sold it. He is now living in a penthouse and having a big party. Moore goes to confront him, assuming he stole the money and hid it from her. When he drunkenly mashes on her, she hits him with a bottle - and Smooch tells her he is dead. And he got the money from a card game the morning after he lost the bar.
She runs to the hiding place and finds the money under a tree's roots. She is so upset that she gives the money to an orphanage and goes to the police. But when she confesses, they call Haas and he answers the phone - he had just been knocked out - I'm not sure if Smooch was kidding or mistaken, but the police turn her away, and after she kind of tries to get the money back, she winds up with her sailor.
This is a fun movie with a lot of suspense and twists, and a slightly mystifying happy ending. But Cleo Moore is the best part - a down-to-earth beauty, honest to a fault, and open to love. I'd love to see more of her, but there doesn't seem to be any on Netflix.
Sunday, October 7, 2018
The Raid
We watched Tomb Raider (2018) mostly out of nostalgia for the 2001 Angelina Jolie version. That felt like it started a new style of action movie. This one feels like just one more - but a pretty good one.
It starts with Lara Croft (Alicia Vikander) as a bike messenger in London. Her father is missing, presumed dead, and she can't access his fortune because she won't accept his death and take control of the firm. She is the usual tough as nails type. When the other messengers declare a "fox hunt", she volunteers to be the fox - she will ride with a dripping can of paint hanging off her bike, and if she can avoid getting caught by the other riders, she wins. It's short but fun, but maybe not as much fun as Premium Rush or Quicksilver.
Vikander finally opens her dad's will and finds some clues that lead her into a secret room under the family vault - yes, in a tomb, but it technically isn't a raid. That sets up the McGuffin, the tomb of Princess Himiko, an ancient Japanese godess who killed everyone she touched. This tomb is hidden on Yametai Island (Japanese for "I want to quit"), so she heads out.
After some goofing around in Hong Kong Harbor (done better in a dozen Jackie Chan movies), she gets Daniel Wu, a washed up drunk, to pilot her to the island - where they immediately wreck. Now, she must spend seven years on this hellish island... Wait, that's the intro to Arrow.
Here she meets the bad guy, Walter Goggins, a Nazi archeologist - wait, not Nazi, that's Indiana Jones - an archeologist searching for the same tomb. She also finds her father, Dominic West (Jigsaw), who has been trapped for seven years on this hellish - sorry, I did it again.
Now we get into some serious tomb raiding, in the underground tunnels. I got a very Lovecraftian, cyclopean, non-Euclidean geometry feel here, which is good and a bit unexpected.
I've skipped over what is the best part of these movies - the action and stunts. They are mostly well-done. although there is obviously plenty of CGI and greenscreen - same as in the game. Vikander is a much more convincing action star than Jolie, who relied a lot on stuntpeople and editing. She is also more realistic. She gets beat up a lot, and she doesn't make every shot she takes. (Of course, Jolie played a more experienced, well-trained Croft.)
In fact, my conclusion is that this movie is not that good, but Vikander is great. She brings immediacy and depth to her role, really more than is in the script. She is so much better than the movie.
Also, the music for the original was great - full of "jock jams", pump-em up grooves. In this version, nothing special.
It starts with Lara Croft (Alicia Vikander) as a bike messenger in London. Her father is missing, presumed dead, and she can't access his fortune because she won't accept his death and take control of the firm. She is the usual tough as nails type. When the other messengers declare a "fox hunt", she volunteers to be the fox - she will ride with a dripping can of paint hanging off her bike, and if she can avoid getting caught by the other riders, she wins. It's short but fun, but maybe not as much fun as Premium Rush or Quicksilver.
Vikander finally opens her dad's will and finds some clues that lead her into a secret room under the family vault - yes, in a tomb, but it technically isn't a raid. That sets up the McGuffin, the tomb of Princess Himiko, an ancient Japanese godess who killed everyone she touched. This tomb is hidden on Yametai Island (Japanese for "I want to quit"), so she heads out.
After some goofing around in Hong Kong Harbor (done better in a dozen Jackie Chan movies), she gets Daniel Wu, a washed up drunk, to pilot her to the island - where they immediately wreck. Now, she must spend seven years on this hellish island... Wait, that's the intro to Arrow.
Here she meets the bad guy, Walter Goggins, a Nazi archeologist - wait, not Nazi, that's Indiana Jones - an archeologist searching for the same tomb. She also finds her father, Dominic West (Jigsaw), who has been trapped for seven years on this hellish - sorry, I did it again.
Now we get into some serious tomb raiding, in the underground tunnels. I got a very Lovecraftian, cyclopean, non-Euclidean geometry feel here, which is good and a bit unexpected.
I've skipped over what is the best part of these movies - the action and stunts. They are mostly well-done. although there is obviously plenty of CGI and greenscreen - same as in the game. Vikander is a much more convincing action star than Jolie, who relied a lot on stuntpeople and editing. She is also more realistic. She gets beat up a lot, and she doesn't make every shot she takes. (Of course, Jolie played a more experienced, well-trained Croft.)
In fact, my conclusion is that this movie is not that good, but Vikander is great. She brings immediacy and depth to her role, really more than is in the script. She is so much better than the movie.
Also, the music for the original was great - full of "jock jams", pump-em up grooves. In this version, nothing special.
Thursday, October 4, 2018
Half a Movie
Half a Sinner (1940) is a neat little no-name B-movie comedy, directed by Al Christie, who at least directed the Ruggles Charlie’s Aunt. It was based on a Dalton Trumbull story, but that’s about it.
Anne Gladden is a prim and proper school teacher who decides to kick over the traces for one day. She buys a nice outfit and goes to sit out in the park. When a masher tries to get fresh with her, she escapes driving his car. But it turns out he’s a killer, and the corpse in the back seat has evidence in the pocket of his coat that incriminates his boss.
Ms. Gladden feels a little bad about stealing a car, but decides to make the most of it. She passes a John “Dusty” King. who pretends that his car has broken down, and gives him a ride. He seems to be interested in her, but when he notices the corpse in the back, he has second thoughts. She still hasn’t noticed it but when he points it out, she is more philosophical than hysterical. She takes King for a criminal, and decides that she will be a criminal now, too.
They crash the country club, which she fits into because she is fashionably dressed. He fits in because, we are figuring out, he is a member and not a crook. They go to an empty house to hide out (it’s his house, but he doesn’t let on). And so on.
I’m sure you guessed how it all ends: with the crooks caught and King and Gladden a couple. Oh, and SPOILER it was his car that the crooks stole in the first place. That’s why King pretended his car broke down when he saw it.
I wouldn’t call this an unexpected gem, but it was pleasant. Gladden has a nice role, spinsterish but with a sense of fun, willing to go along with the craziness to see where it leads. Dusty King, mainly a singing cowboy, does fine as the male lead, but it is all pretty generic. Still, it was short.
Anne Gladden is a prim and proper school teacher who decides to kick over the traces for one day. She buys a nice outfit and goes to sit out in the park. When a masher tries to get fresh with her, she escapes driving his car. But it turns out he’s a killer, and the corpse in the back seat has evidence in the pocket of his coat that incriminates his boss.
Ms. Gladden feels a little bad about stealing a car, but decides to make the most of it. She passes a John “Dusty” King. who pretends that his car has broken down, and gives him a ride. He seems to be interested in her, but when he notices the corpse in the back, he has second thoughts. She still hasn’t noticed it but when he points it out, she is more philosophical than hysterical. She takes King for a criminal, and decides that she will be a criminal now, too.
They crash the country club, which she fits into because she is fashionably dressed. He fits in because, we are figuring out, he is a member and not a crook. They go to an empty house to hide out (it’s his house, but he doesn’t let on). And so on.
I’m sure you guessed how it all ends: with the crooks caught and King and Gladden a couple. Oh, and SPOILER it was his car that the crooks stole in the first place. That’s why King pretended his car broke down when he saw it.
I wouldn’t call this an unexpected gem, but it was pleasant. Gladden has a nice role, spinsterish but with a sense of fun, willing to go along with the craziness to see where it leads. Dusty King, mainly a singing cowboy, does fine as the male lead, but it is all pretty generic. Still, it was short.
Tuesday, October 2, 2018
Insidiousest
Insidious: Chapter 3 (2015) is another sequel to the Insidious saga - or prequel rather, since the protagonist dies in the first entry. This entry will be the origin of Specs and Tucker.
Stefanie Scott is a normal teenage girl who’s mother has died. Her father, Dermott Mulroney is coping by working too hard and ignoring everything. Scott starts taking up Ouija and eventualy visits Elise, Lin Shaye, the psychic from the other movies. But Elise’s husband has died and she has quit the business.
But evil spirits are hunting Scott, and she winds up with broken legs and a bad haunting. So her younger brother gets her father to hire YouTube ghostbusters Specs and Tucker. This pair’s comic relief is my second favorite part of the series, next to Shaye’s desolate spiritual strength.
This is where we get Elise’s classic working style, where she goes into the spirit world while Specs and Tucker record her.
Like the second entry, this doesn’t match the intensity of the first - although at least it doesn’t try to use “Tiptoe Through the Tulips” as a scary effect. We’re ready for the final entry.
Stefanie Scott is a normal teenage girl who’s mother has died. Her father, Dermott Mulroney is coping by working too hard and ignoring everything. Scott starts taking up Ouija and eventualy visits Elise, Lin Shaye, the psychic from the other movies. But Elise’s husband has died and she has quit the business.
But evil spirits are hunting Scott, and she winds up with broken legs and a bad haunting. So her younger brother gets her father to hire YouTube ghostbusters Specs and Tucker. This pair’s comic relief is my second favorite part of the series, next to Shaye’s desolate spiritual strength.
This is where we get Elise’s classic working style, where she goes into the spirit world while Specs and Tucker record her.
Like the second entry, this doesn’t match the intensity of the first - although at least it doesn’t try to use “Tiptoe Through the Tulips” as a scary effect. We’re ready for the final entry.
Monday, October 1, 2018
Running on the Rims
Sorry about the delay in posting. I had keyboard problems - but also a movie that I didn’t have much to say about. Of course we had to see Pacific Rim Uprising (2018) even if Guillermo del Toro wasn’t directing (it is Steven DeKnight’s feature debut). But we didn’t have high hopes.
It starts with John Boyega, son of the mighty Stacker Pentecost from PR1, leading a sketchy group to steal some tech from a Jaeger junkyard. But plucky little Cailee Spaeny got there first. She needs the part for her funky little one-pilot Jaeger. So we get a nice little three-way battle that ends with the police coming done and forcibly inducting them into the Jaeger forces, working with Scott Eastwood and Rinko Kikuichi.
So, only one returning character (Kikuchi). So I was pretty stoked when the two mad scientists, Burn Gorman and Charlie Day, showed up. Smarmy Day is working with some megacorp doing ethically ambiguous work on the kaiju. Gorman, more hunchbacked and lumpy than ever, is still working with the Jaeger forces.
I’m just going to cut to the spoiler and let you know: Day has a bit of kaiju cortex and he’s been having drift-sex with it. In fact, he may be married to it, it isn’t clear. But he’s definitely had his mind taken over.
A lot of the movie is about a plot by megacorp to replace Jaegers with drones, possibly drones with kaiju brains. Since the rift was closed in the last movie, there aren’t a lot of kaiju fights for most of the movie. Then Charlie Day and the kaiju brains start opening rifts everywhere, and then there are some fights.
The first movie was pretty much a fun piece of noise, fluff, and special effects. So is this one. I liked the traitor to humanity stuff, but the rest of the movie was not that original. So we had fun and immediately forgot it. We will probably rewatch and it may even improve with time. But it was better when del Toro did it.
It starts with John Boyega, son of the mighty Stacker Pentecost from PR1, leading a sketchy group to steal some tech from a Jaeger junkyard. But plucky little Cailee Spaeny got there first. She needs the part for her funky little one-pilot Jaeger. So we get a nice little three-way battle that ends with the police coming done and forcibly inducting them into the Jaeger forces, working with Scott Eastwood and Rinko Kikuichi.
So, only one returning character (Kikuchi). So I was pretty stoked when the two mad scientists, Burn Gorman and Charlie Day, showed up. Smarmy Day is working with some megacorp doing ethically ambiguous work on the kaiju. Gorman, more hunchbacked and lumpy than ever, is still working with the Jaeger forces.
I’m just going to cut to the spoiler and let you know: Day has a bit of kaiju cortex and he’s been having drift-sex with it. In fact, he may be married to it, it isn’t clear. But he’s definitely had his mind taken over.
A lot of the movie is about a plot by megacorp to replace Jaegers with drones, possibly drones with kaiju brains. Since the rift was closed in the last movie, there aren’t a lot of kaiju fights for most of the movie. Then Charlie Day and the kaiju brains start opening rifts everywhere, and then there are some fights.
The first movie was pretty much a fun piece of noise, fluff, and special effects. So is this one. I liked the traitor to humanity stuff, but the rest of the movie was not that original. So we had fun and immediately forgot it. We will probably rewatch and it may even improve with time. But it was better when del Toro did it.
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