Classic Black and White

In the mood for some more black and white, I queued up Woman Chases Man (1937), picked more or less at random from Prime Video. 

Charles Winninger is a tycoon who is broke. He needs money to complete his housing development, or he will be wiped out. His son, Joel McCrea, has money from his late mother, but thinks his father is a crackpot, who will only lose the money. He's on a cruise, but is on his way home. 

Enter Miriam Hopkins, a newly graduated architecture student who has houses designed for the development, looking for a job. When she finds out Winninger has no money, she faints. She hasn't been eating.

Once she has brought up to speed, she comes up with a simple plan. She'll vamp McCrea into coming across with the money. She has seen paintings of him looking noble, and wimpy, and figures it will be easy. She doesn't reckon with him being Joel McCrea.

Once McCrea shows up, with his golddigging girlfriend and her Russian "uncle" (lover), the usual screwball antics take over. Wininger hides (for some reason?), pals are brought in to play servants (Broderick Crawford as Hunk), meals are cooked without food ot gas, etc. Frankly, it isn't exactly hilarious. 

But it is bright, cute and cheerful. It ends with McCrea getting drunk - which he never does because it makes him want to spend money, and winds up in a tree. So, a happy ending. 

I watched Bulldog Drummond Strikes Back (1934) on Archive.org - a good resource for random out-of-copyright movies. In this movie, Ronald Coleman makes an excellent Drummond, while Charles Butterworth is his pal Algy. Algy is getting married to Una Merkel, and Drummond promises police inspector C. Aubrey Smith that he is giving up adventuring. 

But walking home from the wedding in the fog, he stumbles on a corpse. But when the police show up, there is no corpse. just the home of a wealthy Asian (Warner Oland, of course). As usual, he ropes C. Aubrey in, and gets Butterworth out of his honeymoon bedroom to join his quest to get to the bottom of this. All this adventure needs is a beautiful woman - and who should walk in but Loretta Young.

This adventure all takes place in one night, with the inspector getting no sleep and Algy getting no chance to sonsumate his nuptials. Along with the disappearing corpse, Young's hotel room, and whole identity disappear. There is a secret code that only Algy can break, and of course, Deadly "orientals", including Mischa Auer! 

Coleman makes a great Drummond, the greatest perhaps. This movie isn't afraid to be silly, but there's still plenty of action. 

Now, really what I wanted to watch was Madame Satan on Archive.org,  but I couldn't get it to play correctly. I've found a different version, though. I hope to see this classic soon. 

It's Stinks

I've had a copy of Freejack (1992) in my library for a while (bought it together with Performance), and I decided it was time. What a great idea.

Emilio Estevez stars as an upcoming racecar driver named Alex Furlong. He lives with Rene Russo, and plans to marry her if he wins some races. But instead, there is a terrible. But a group from the future are ready - they grab him and pull him into the dystopian, diseased future. You see, in this future, they can transfer the minds of the wealthy into young, healthy bodies. The problem is there are no healthy bodies anymore - too much drugs and pollution. So rich Anthony Hopkins goes to the past for his new body.

But before his mind can be wiped for transfer, her escapes, becoming a "freejack" in the awkward parlance of the future. Hopkins sends his best freejack hunters after him - a guy dubiously named Vacendak, played by Mick Jagger! 

After bumbling around through the various routine firefights and tank battles of the dystopia, he finds his old manager, David Johansen. Will he help Estevez find Russo, or sell him out? Come on, take a guess

I've known about this movie for a while, mainly from bad movie podcasts. How Did This Get Made did an amazing episode on it, where Jessica St. Clair talks about her Philadelphia family's Faberge egg collection. But the movie seemed very MST3K coded to me. The goofy mini-tanks, the squad leader shouting "Move, move, move!", and Mick Jagger himself, looking at Estevez's racing, and saying, "He's good!" If only he'd made an OK sign and said, "It stinks!"

This is a bad movie, no two ways about it. It was clearly made with some money, and the cast list looks pretty solid for a B movie - not even counting Jagger's stunt casting. (He isn't bad, although I'm sure he can smell the stink on this.) But it isn't so bad it's hard to watch. In fact, it's so bad, it's good. 

Honey Murder

I've mentioned my love of Dorothy Sayer's Lord Peter Wimsey stories. I recently discovered Busman’s Honeymoon (1940), a movie version of the last of the series existed. Not only that, but it stars Robert Montgomery and Constance Cummings and is available on YouTube. 

Montgomery plays Lord Peter, an aristocratic amateur detective and Cummings plays Harriet Vane, a mystery novelist who Peter wooed for 4-5 books. They are getting married, and they both swear that they will abandon detecting in favor of matrimony. Cummings mentions that she loved the old house she was brought up in, Tallboys in Cornwall. So Montgomery nips out and secretly buys the place for her.

The owner was William Noakes, a nasty and miserly sort. He meets with a number of people that night, all of whom he owes money to - and none are paid. 

The next evening, the newlyweds arrive in Wimsey's Dusenberg, with Bunter (Sir Seymour Hicks), their butler, tenderly protecting a case of wine. They can't raise anyone, although they expected to be given the keys and perhaps a bite to eat. Finally, they get a key from Noakes' mousy niece.

The next day they are settling in, trying to get the chimney to draw, meeting the Reverend, and so on. This seems to go on for days, before they discover Noakes' body in the cellar, bludgeoned to death. Will Lord and Lady Wimsey be able to resist detecting when a murder is found, right under their feet?

First, let me say that American Robert Montgomery is an odd choice for a British aristocrat. But we do like him, and if you ignore his American-ness, his light style works rather well for Wimsey. Cummings as Vane works better, but is a bit less interesting than she could have been. It was originally going to be Robert Donat and Maureen O'Sullivan, but the film was shelved during the war, and recast when things quieted down. It would have been a different movie, and probably better.

But what's here is quite enjoyable. The eccentric locals, played by some fine character actors (including Robert Newton, using his local accent), are fun to watch. It takes way too long to get to the murder, and the resolution is ridiculous - but it was in the original story. In fact, it's a famously far-fetched murder method. 

I guess it wasn't very good as a Peter Wimsey movie (although better than the last one we watched). But it was a fine as a pleasant, black-and-white cozy mystery. And it did have Harriet's beloved Tallboys, and Peter's beloved Dusenberg, and of course, everybody's beloved Bunter. 

Ashes, Redux

I really don't have a lot to say about Avatar: Fire and Ash (2025). There's a lot going on in this 3-1/2 hour movie, but not of a lot of it sticks. 

So, Sam Worthington in his Na'vi body, with wife Zoe Saldana is living with the sea people and his kids. They are grieving the death of one son at the hands of evil Stephen Lang. They also hang with Jack Champion, the gone-native son of Lang - Saldana kid of wants him dead for a pink skin. And Lang wants Worthington dead and Champion back on base with the corporate human faction.

The fun begins when the corporation meet the Ash tribe, a feral group who take nose drugs and deny the goddess of the world, called Enya (check that later). They are lead by sexy Geraldine Chaplin, covered in ash body paint, with a narrow belt for a bra. She is savage and hot. Lang likes her style, and recruits her tribe as allies in the war against the Na'vi, and particularly Worthington.

Then when Champion has run out of the oxygen he needs to survive, one of the family kids hooks him up to Enya Oyva Eywa, and he gets a new set of lungs that can breathe like a Na'vi. If mankind learns this trick, the Na'vi will have no chance. 

That's the setup. There will be a bunch of action scenes, and a lot of Lang and Worthington having to work together to save Champion. There are a lot of situations highlighting the differences and similarity between Marine and Na'vi warrior cultures. You know, they aren't so different... Oh never mind. 

Of course, the whole thing looks awesome. Every frame an album cover. the action scenes are very well done, with a lot of flying and some underwater work (calling back to the last big fight in the last movie). However, for some reason, I couldn't warm up to this movie - same as the last two. I guess it's in the writing. Somehow it fails to get me interested in any of these characters. Maybe because it's all over the place, overflowing with themes. Maybe it's because Sam Worthington is sounding (and his avatar looking) more and more like Mel Gibson (ugh). 

It's a puzzle to me. These should be my favorite movies. Instead, I enjoy watching them, get annoyed after the third or fourth ending, then forgetting the whole thing the minute it's over. Oh well, can't complain about sexy Geraldine Chaplin. 

Oh, wait, yes I can. Her character has a nasty habit of forcing nonconsensual ponytail contact - not cool girl. It even cool when Saldana ponytail rapes her in revenge.  

Room Reno

It was funny  watching The Doorman (2020) right after Hokum. Both take place mostly in a closed hotel. Not many other similarities. This is your basic one-woman army action movie. 

It starts with our heroine, Ruby Rose, as one of the guards in a limo convoy for a high government official and her young daughter. They are ambushed and massacred. Only she survives. Then she wakes up. SPOILER - this has pretty much nothing to do with the rest of the movie, it just establishes that she has PTSD.

Since she is apparently out of the Army, she needs a new job. Her uncle is a handyman in a New York hotel and gets her a job as doorman. The other doorman is a cheerful Slav played by Aksel Henning. Since the hotel is being closed for renovation, the job will be pretty easy. 

It turns out that her brother-in-law (Rupert Evans) is living in the hotel with his young daughter and teen son. The wife, Rose's sister, is dead, and she is not in communication with them. Her uncle set her up for a reconciliation. She does meet and the little girl is so cute, she agrees to have Easter dinner with them. The hotel will be closed, leaving with only this family staying over for the holiday and an older couple who can't easily move.

And so, with everyone else out, Rose comes in with a pie, and Henning kills her uncle in the locker room. Then he invites in Jean Reno and a group of thugs. He has business with that old couple. The old man has some paintings that he wants. The hitch is that he has had a stroke and can't remember where they are hidden. So this may take a while. And the search may include Rose's family's apartment. 

The rest is pretty rote. Some cat-and-mouse stuff. The little girl is taken hostage. The teen learns that fighting is hard. The hotel is locked up and comms are cut so our heroes can't get out or call for help. And so on. 

Reno is that well-mannered, world-weary and ruthless criminal. He also seems pretty checked out - doesn't really light up the screen. Henning is pretty good as a fun seeming guy who is a total killer. I like Rose a lot. She looks fierce and credible in her fight scenes. 

But, let's face it. This isn't a great movie. It is nicely stripped down - maybe could have stripped out the prologue - but doesn't break new ground. Oh well, I like a female-led action films, even when they let me down. But here's a question - does this count since Ruby Rose is gender fluid?

Maybe this should go into the "blue-collar occupation titled action movies" genre, like The Courier, The Mechanic and The Beekeeper. 

Haunted Hotel

Ms. Spenser has a cold, which means she doesn't have the strength to work, which means she gets to watch a movie - a horror movie: Hokum (2026).

Hokum starts in a desert. A conquistador with a treasure map in a bottle is trekking a wasteland, followed by a boy. When he feels he is close, he finds out that he can't get the map out of the bottle - and he can't break the bottle because everything around is soft. So he has the kid turn around, and gets ready to use his skull to break the bottle.

Then you find out that this is a story, being written by Scott Adams. He lives in a sterile, modernist house, and he's stuck on the ending. He decides that it's time to spread his parents ashes, and decides on Ireland, in a place where they were happy.

He shows up in Ireland at a little hotel and is immediately a jerk to everyone - the desk clerk, the owner telling ghost stories to the kids, the bellboy, the groundskeeper killing the goats that keep getting up on the parked cars. He is only civil to Fiona (Florence Ordesh), the bartender. She even helps him figure out the exact location of a great tree his parents visited. 

Out in the forest, he finds the tree and leaves his parents ashes - then discovers that he has an audience. An old hippie or bum (David Wilmot) is watching him, sipping magic mushrooms in goat's milk. Seems nice.

Back at the hotel, the bellboy chats with him, and tries to get him to read his book. Scott is dismissive, and finally burns the back of the bellboys hand to get him to leave. Later, when Ordesh wants to return his tape recorder, she finds him hanged in his room. She cuts him down.

He wakes up in hospital, happy to be alive. He wants to thank Ordesh, but she's been missing since Halloween. Wilmot, the hippie, is suspected. But when Scott meets Wilmot, he thinks she is being held captive in the hotel, possibly in the honeymoon suite. 

Now, the honeymoon suite has been locked up for a few years, possibly to keep a witch in. But as the hotel is going to be closed and empty for the off season, Jerry proposes that they sneak in when everyone has left and find Ordesh. 

As you can imagine, they get locked in, and the hotel is not empty. There is at least one human villian, and more than likely, some who are not human. 

It's more than a little weird watching Scott in a non-comic role. He starts out so obnoxious, you wonder if you should be laughing. In fact, a lot of the movie is sort of maybe funny, before it gets hairy. 

And it gets quite hairy. As usual, the witch is the least of the problems - it's the humans that are really evil (Ms. Spenser is tired of this, and prefers real ghosts and monsters). The setting, an old hotel with some hidden features, is used pretty effectively. I have to say, there isn't a lot of Irishism going on, but that's probably for the best. At the risk of spoiling -SPOILER- there is a possible explanation for all the odd stuff going on - mushroom milk. 

And in the end, Scott re-writes the end to his story. The conquistador offers his own head to break the bottle and he and the kid embrace. 

Down by the Ocean

I'd never heard of Celebration at Big Sur (1971) before I saw a mention on Reddit. So I looked it up on Youtube, and there it was. It was a commercially released film about a folk/rock concert that took place at Esalen about a month after Woodstock. The stars included Joan Baez, CSNY, and Joni Mitchell, but they weren't the only stars.

Esalen, by the way, is a holistic study center in Big Sur. They held a small yearly folk-oriented festival, but the one in 1969 generated a lot of interest, due to the sensation that was Woodstock. Because it's sort of perched on a steep slope above the ocean, there was only room for a few hundred people. There was no publicity, and tickets were an outrageous $4. Thousands showed up and camped out on the shoulders of Rt. 1. Surprisingly, the outsiders were pretty well-behaved.

Joan Baez sang a few autobiographical songs: Song for David, about her husband jailed for antiwar activism, and Sir Galahad, about her sister Mimi's second husband. CSNY does a rocking version of Sea of Madness, and Down by the River, and Stephen Stills does a solo acoustic 4+20. John Sebastian sings I'll Paint Rainbows All Over Your Blues. Joni Mitchell sings Woodstock (first performance?), although I question her choice to end with some scat-yodelling. Mimi Farina and Julie Payne do Changes, and Carol Cisneros does a nice Mexican tune, Malaguena Salerosa. 

The hottest act, however, was Dorothy Combs Morrison and the Combs Sisters. They are sometimes credited as the Edwin Hawkins Singers, but I think that's because she sang Oh Happy Day with them. She is a strong gospel singer and sings three or four songs, including Oh Happy Day.

Mixed in with the music are behind the scenes vignettes and "interviews" with some of the non-attendants outside the venue. "Interviews" in quotes, because mostly they sorted of pointed the camera at them and let them rap. A science teacher in face paint talked about teaching in schools and on the road. He liked schools because he gets paid and has tenure. But he has painted his school bus (with a big "Woodstock") and plans to teach on the road. He has a little boy playing harmonica so he can dance during the discussion. "Twanger guy" played two notes on his little folk instrument and kind of improvised a blues tune about visiting his friend in LA and driving up to Big Sur. 

Twanger guy also talks about how tickets should be free. Inside, a disturbed man rails against greedy musicians getting paid for the concert, so Stephen Stills comes down to discuss it with him. It doesn't go well. 

There's also a scene in the hot springs bath that Esalen is famous for, with some far-out harmony singing. One person, not a fan of the baths, calls them smelly, sulferous, and hot. In another, someone spots a whale in the ocean, and everyone crowds around the cliff-side, rather dangerously. And so on.

I wish we got to hear more of the music. It was pretty hot. All the stuff with the fans and outsiders was actually kind of fun - at least I liked it. But I'd rather hear more Joni Mitchell.