Beauty at the Vanities

I wanted to see Murder at the Vanities / Search for Beauty (1934) because my frat back in college used to rent Murder and show it for the “reefer” based music. Turns out I had misremembered most of it.

Murder takes place at Earl Carroll’s Vanities, a real New York night club show, famous for scantily clad women. Carroll is out of town, so Jack Oakie is taking over. His stars are Kitty Carlisle and French nonentity Carl Brisson, soon to be wed. Meanwhile, police detective Victor McLaglen wants free tickets to the show, but Oakie won’t come across. They have a nice exchange of insults throughout the movie.

Someone starts trying to kill Carlisle, so McLaglen decides to take the case, mostly so he can watch the show. The bodies start to pile up, but the show must go on. 

So how is the show? Sadly, not great. Kitty Carlisle sing/talks through her numbers. Brisson sings “Cocktails for Two” - we prefer the Spike Jones version. Carlisle’s reefer song is a Latin number called “Marijuana”, and it isn’t good. I had remembered that Ellington performed “That Funny Reefer Man”, but that was Cab Calloway. Maybe it was included on the film as a short subject. 

Duke does have a number, but it is a jazz riff on Chopin’s Hungarian Rhapsody, called “Rape of the Rhapsody”. Cringe. At least the number has some good dancing. The rest of the numbers feature hundreds of beautiful women in scanty dress just posing. Some are topless, but always behind their crossed arms. Pre-Code, but not so sexy. In fact, the presence of Kitty Carlisle makes you think of the musical numbers in a Marx Brothers movie that you fast forward through. 

Search turned out to be a lot more fun. It starts with Robert Armstrong and Gertrude Michael getting out of jail. Armstrong has a great idea for a new hustle - totally legit. They’ll take over an old-times Health and Exercise magazine, recruit some athletes, and get them to show some skin. They just need some upfront money - James Gleason (Here Comes Mr. Jordan).

The athletes they pick are Buster Crabbe and Ida Lupino (still with a little English accent). They think this is all legit, and actually set up a health farm.  But Armstrong is going for sleaze so there’s going to be a showdown.

The funny thing is, the movie is the same way. It’s about health and exercise and clean living, but you get to see Buster Crabbe’s naked butt in the shower room - although Lupino’s shower scene is shoulders and up. 

It’s all good fun - there’s even a musical that’s no worse than the ones in Murder. Plus, James Gleason is one of our favorite character actors. So I’d say the double bill is worth it, but you can skip the first movie.