Murder by Boredom

We ran out of movies so we went to our Watch Instantly queue. Our setup isn't really ideal for this - sharing a laptop at an awkward distance, poor speaker placement, etc. With the right film, this can be overcome. Unfortunately, we picked Murder by Death.

We knew it was Neil Simon going in, and were willing to accept that risk. We had enjoyed Clue, another murder mystery spoof in an old, dark house, and that didn't get very good reviews. But MbD - well, it stunk on ice.

The idea is that 5 great detectives and their sidekicks are invited to a murder at a spooky house by "Lionel Twain" (Truman Capote). If you like the name, I'm sorry, I've just spoiled the best joke in the movie. The detectives are:

• Peter Sellers doing Charlie Chan - not as funny as you'd think
  
• Peter Falk doing Sam Spade - pretty funny: his Bogart is quite good
• James Coco underplaying Hercule Poirot - still pretty hammy
• David Niven and Maggie Smith as Nick and Nora Charles - dull
• Elsa Lanchester doing Miss Marple - charming but underplayed

Actually, that sounds pretty good when I write it down. Neil Simon probably had the same experience. But then he did nothing with it.

The jokes are predictable or missing. The plot is nonsensical with arbitrary twists (that are hammered home in the most leaden manner imaginable). The whole thing is a waste. Clue will give you some idea of what can be done with the exact same premise (I wonder if they cribbed from MbD or just from the same sources?).

From now on, when I see the name "Neil Simon", I'll think of wit, sophistication, cleverness - that's what he's missing.

In conclusion: I wonder if Who Is Killing the Great Chefs of Europe? is any good?