Blades 2

So, if Ms. Spenser is busy or all movied out, I will watch something that she doesn't care about. I thought I found the perfect movie that she definitely did not want to see: Rob Zombie's The Munsters (2022). It started with a graverobber and his assistant. The assistant says, "Master, the crypt is empty", and the graverobber replies, "Ya think?" Boy, that joke is certainly fresh and timely. Next scene, Grampa Munster (with very well done makeup and costume, I must say) rises mysteriously from his coffin, then cries out, "My back!" OK, two short scenes, two monumentally lame gags. I bailed. 

Decided to try Blade of the 47 Ronin (2022) instead. I enjoyed the first one, although mostly for Keanu Reeves (and maybe Rinko Kikuchi). This one is almost completely unrelated, with no overlappiung cast, director or producer. Unlike the original, which took place in medieval Japan, this one takes place in near-future Budapest. In this future, samurai walk around dressed in a mix of kimono and Western business clothes. They have gone international, with African and European members as well as Japanese. They are looking for a blade that is half samurai, half witch. The prophecy states that it must be wielded by a descendant of the loyal retainers to defeat a vague threat.

Anna Akana is bumming around Budapest, doing a little pickpocketing, etc. The samurai, lead by Marc Dacascos, figure out that she is the descendent. They start to train her up, but she notices a strange presence - a hulking seated figure with a ponytail who can deliver magical blows. Based on the ponytail and seated fighting style, I was afraid this was Stephen Seagal, but was actually Daniel Southworth.

I should mention that Dacascos had three young women supporting him, all orphans he picked up and trained. I mention because they are kind of fun and because Akana looks like she'll be another. 

I have to say that the fights are not great, although they do focus on Japanese swords. (When one of our guys just starts using guns near the end, it's kind of cute.) Dacascos does almost nothing in the fights. There's a lot of CGI and wirework as opposed to cool stunt fighting. BUT - the costumes and art direction aren't bad - Japanese schoolgirl outfits, kimono over leisure suit, etc. So, while Ms. Spenser wasn't interested, I was reasonably amused. At least it was better than The Munsters.